Happy Thanksgiving!

I love how I've recieved close to 6 texts by now blaring the same message - HAPPY THANKSGIVING!! I find it rather ironic because of my current SCREW THE WORLD! mood. After a rather hostile afternoon with everyone in the house, my then-bf-now-ex, who knew I was having a bad day called to tell me that after much consideration, he decided that surely 8 months is enough time to get to know somebody and decide if they're the right one for you. And since he couldn't see me in his future, it was wrong of him to lead me on, so he had to break it off. Something that reaaaally should have been told to my face, not my ear. He couldn't've waited until he got home, then drove an hour to tell me to my face, and then be on his merry way.

Oh, he still wants to be friends, and he wants me to come to him when I have a bad day. And "It's not like we'll never see each other again" with me going to McMurry. "If we decide to pick it up again, then maybe" but for now, he wants to meet new people. But we're still going to be friends.

I can't be friends. Not for a while at least, not until I get all the venom out of my system. Which might be a while. I can't even think of talking to him without feeling like I'm having my heart ripped right out of my chest by some dark, skeletal long-fingered hand (Hate, or Wrath anyone?), which makes me angrier, and defensive, because I DON'T LIKE UNWELCOME THINGS TOUCHING ME. My inner tigress is livid, and I can feel her pacing inside of me wanting to be set free from the cage my body is holding her in. Maybe I'll go running later, in an attempt to soothe her.

But even though I'm in a vile mood with a renewed Mama-Grizzly protection over my heart, I'll make a list of what I'm thankful for.

• My Momma, for being amazing with words. And being my Momma. =)
• My Friends, Savanna, Vicki, Peter, RandiK - Thanks for catching me when I fall, comforting me when I hurt, and making me laugh when I really need it.
• Ines, for giving me chocolate, but I actually love her for being amazing anyways. With or without the chocolate. (Although, it is a plus! ;D)
• VOLLEYBALL - I don't know how I'd be able to function as a person without it. Without the blessed ball to take my anger, frustration, stress, and the need to whack the crap out of something, I don't know how I'd get by. My veins crave it.
• Art - Mostly, Duiz. Because, I'm always able to draw him when I need to let my creative juices flow. And the Nate... My Hellish-demonic looking creature who's actually a good guy who eats the bad guys. Love that bird...lion..thing.
• Family - although, they sometimes annoy me, I'm still greatful for them.
• Brownie - This wonderful little stuffed horse has been with me for over 10 years, and he's helped hold my heart together when it felt like it was only falling apart. He's caught a lot of my tears, and is the best at comforting me.
• Confidence - I don't let much get to me, and if you have a problem, I really don't care. I'm secure in myself, my looks, my personality. And feeble attempts to bring me down don't work.

My rant is coming to an end, for I have to go make whipped cream an celebrate the holiday with my family. Time to put on the mask we always wear to hide our true feelings and be a decent hostess and pretend everything is just peachy. =D

Happy Thanksgiving.

Heh... Right.